"One day, you will have a child and that child will be just like you." It's also usually said through clenched teeth and sparks swirl around the head of your angry mother. These are not words to be taken lightly. Oh no, no, no. Because then, no matter what you may think, you will have a child. And said child will definitely be just like you or perhaps worse.
This is the curse. Our mothers hand it down to us at that point when they're beyond the end of the rope. They're grasping at lightning rods.
Now we are mothers/fathers. Have you uttered that sentence, yet? Have you already cursed your sweet, precious children? I have been so close. The teeth were clenched. I felt that twitch in the back of my neck. The one that makes you tilt your head sideways and envision the child/children/demon beaming out of your house. But something makes me stop.
This child/children/brat/demon is just like me and it's all my mother's fault. (I love that clause-the blame your parents clause. Because you know your children/brats are going to do it to you.)
Do I want to do that to her, yet? Is she deserving of the absolute hell I go through daily? Worrying about how well she is doing in school, is she sleeping enough? Am I making good enough dinners(think of last night's dinner and cringe..more guilt piles on top of guilt for previous worries)? Does she have friends, do I want her to have friends? Those other girls are snots. I hate those other girls. I want to strangle their cruel little necks!! Oh..where was I? She is just like me which means she probably will want to strangle them if I keep thinking this. Okay, it's all okay. Really, it's fine. Insert worries about the house, the sibling rivalry, the sibling ganging up on mom, the meal for that night and possibly twenty other things we are forgetting, which will bring us right back to guilt.
I sigh. For now, I'll keep the curse as a last resort. We haven't hit adolescence yet. That is possibly the first time those words flew from my own mother's mouth. (Uhm, thanks for that. I got three of them all like me.)
Hi Kristi,
ReplyDeleteGreat blogpost. I chuckled all the way through. Been there, done that.
My mother cast the curse on me and even though I apologized to her every day while my daughter went through puberty, my mother didn't have the power to reverse it. She would just say, "Hmmm. She sounds just like you."
My daughter is 22 and its too late, the curse was already cast long ago, so I wait patiently for her to have children of her own.
I am ready to say, "Hmmm. She sounds just like you."
My mother always says, 'Just you wait....' in an ominous sort of way whenever I complain that I can't get my stubborn spirited daughter to comply with my wishes.
ReplyDeleteI know that my mum is actively hoping that she turns out to be a nightmare teenager just so that she can laugh and say, 'Karma dear, it's called karma!'